What is Bulimia? Part Four Why Do I Get Compulsions To Binge And Purge? Whether your first purge was through guilt, an attempt to lose weight or a control thing... It doesn't matter. What matters is you did it... And then you did it again... And again..
The purging almost certainly started off as a choice. It was something you could control. It was something you could possess and call your own. You believed it served you because you could eat what you wanted and not feel guilty or gain weight... In fact you probably felt initially that it helped you lose weight and look better. Then things started getting out of hand. Rather than you controlling it - it began controlling you.
In addition to your obsessive thoughts and intense emotions you now had uncontrollable compulsions to deal with. Here's an example to help you understand why the compulsion is there: We're going to do an exercise. Now use your discretion here. If you have any sort of medical condition or you're particularly frail - don't do it.
It's understanding the conclusion that's important! Sit comfortably and hold your breath for as long as you can. Don't block your airways or do anything else that's stupid. Notice how long you can hold your breath before you start breathing again. Now, ONLY if you're fit and healthy and comfortable with the exercise... Go ahead and do it. Pause the video until you're done. So how long did you last? 20 seconds? 30 seconds? A minute? Normally you breathe on autopilot and don't have to think about it. But for this exercise you tried to overcome a natural subconscious behaviour through your conscious willpower Sure, you managed to hold your breath temporarily - but then what? When your mind detected an oxygen shortage it decided it was going to override your decision and start breathing again.
You'll perhaps also notice that your first breath in was a seriously large one... As you needed the extra oxygen to regulate your body and survive. Now, what are you doing with bulimia? You are starving your body of nutrition. Binging is the brains way of taking the deep breath in. However, following the breath holding exercise you allowed your lungs to have the oxygen your body needed - so you don't have an ongoing compulsion to take deep breaths. With bulimia you take the food in (to satisfy the compulsion) but then purge it out again before the body can absorb the nutrition.
Thus what is happening is your mind and body realise even after a compulsive binge the nutrition it was expecting wasn't absorbed. So it gives you a compulsion for another binge and focuses your attention on food. Each time you follow a binge with a purge the brain has to run another cycle of trying to get nutrition into your malnourished body. It's working in panic mode just like when it feels you're suffocating from a lack of oxygen.
YOU are causing this! YOU are bringing this upon yourself! YOU keep this process running through your fears and self perception! Essentially what you have is a conflict between your brains core programming (to survive and be healthy) and the habitual thought processes that make you feel bad regarding your own self-perception. When you go to war with yourself... You can only lose. As mentioned earlier, the compulsion to binge comes about BECAUSE you purge (however you do it).
The reason you purge is BECAUSE you feel bad (guilty, anxious, fearful of weight gain). The reason you feel bad is BECAUSE of your thought processes and beliefs. The problem is that bulimia doesn't address your thoughts or beliefs - does it? That's why you're trapped, feel so bad and potentially face much worse in the future. In the next video we'll discuss and address the common fears of overcoming Bulimia. If you found this video helpful and you like the idea of us sharing our research and development with the people who need it - please subscribe and give us a 'thumbs up'.
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